It’s Read an Ebook Week!
Congrats to Northmoon, Beth P, Seanna Lea, Kelly, and Sheryl VV, who all won copies of Crazy Aunt Purl’s new book!
And congrats to Jase and RachelT, who each won an ebook short story bundle from Addison Albright!
I had a lucky weekend myself – thanks to Josh Lanyon and Jessewave for the copy of The Dark Farewell that I won. And thanks to Janey Chapel and Jenre for the copy of Maritime Men that I won!
While I don’t have a clever name for this guy (Weird Facial Hair Guy is all I’ve come up with Thanks to Jeanne’s suggestion, he’s now Caterpillar On Chin Guy – check out some stock photos of him and see if you agree), I do have a sordid tale to share with you today. It’s the story of a woman
with finding
to call ”
“. (Can I get a show of hands from those who are convinced they could make a better cover than the one for My Captive Lover above, even without a working knowledge of PhotoShop? Yeah, me, too.)
Whoops! Looks like that lady’s pretty fickle, huh? Poor Caterpillar On Chin Guy…
(Good thing the designer used capital letters for the title on that cover is all I’m saying…)
In his despair over being so quickly captured and ditched, COCG decided to try
. Silly COCG – I fear that can only end in bloodshed and scarring. Both Jeanne and CJ can tell you that merely entering the Chaos Kitty’s territory (aka my condo) leads to poofing, hissing, growling, and all around general menacing. Mastering? Eeep.*
I have one more cover, the title of which has me simultaneously rolling my eyes and shaking my head.
Time for another show of hands! Anyone out there think the title is actually referring to wintery precipitation? Me, either.
“…..zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz…..” -Chaos
*He looks singularly unworried about being mastered, doesn’t he?
His name is Snow?
Oh come on now, what else could the title be referring to?
Chaos looks very worried, indeed!
.-= Julie´s last blog ..Please Vote! =-.
I think “Abnormally Large Chest Guy” might be fitting. He looks like he’s going to fall over from his disproportionally large pecs.
.-= Brigitte´s last blog ..This Is What Happens =-.
Personally, I’d call him Skunk Beard Boy.
.-= trek´s last blog ..(Just) desserts =-.
LOL! Um, nope. Don’t believe nine inches of snow is on their mind. 😉
Weird they put that scruffy line on his chin…kind of icky.
.-= Donna-FantasyDreamer´s last blog ..Shade Fright by Sean Cummings – Winner! =-.
I like the name “Soul Man” for his soul patch.
9 inches of snow? Oh my. At least we know she won’t be disappointed.
I just come here for kitty pron, not the titles or pictures on books. Chaos looks like he’s in heaven and that means he’s a happy kitty.
.-= margene´s last blog ..Blue Monday =-.
What is that on his face? A billy goat’s gruff? Chaos must have had a wild weekend;).
.-= Melanie´s last blog ..FO: Knitted Poop =-.
Egads, that last title is really bad! So it’s a Siren Publishing “Classic,” eh?
.-= Jodi´s last blog ..my heart belongs to the snows of Buffalo and Chicago, and all the dirty cities along the way =-.
Aw, Chaos looks remarkably unthreatening in that photo. Except, of course, that he’s pointy-side-up already…
.-= naomi´s last blog ..a weekend’s spinning =-.
Are those AOL inches? 😀
I saw a book title the other day that was ALMOST that bad. “Hung Like a Dead Man”
haha! 😀
Jase
Holy! There must be a factory somewhere full of dis-enchanted English Majors who crank out romance books by the gross. Perhaps it’s located next door to the studio where the four book cover models are housed. It’s so funny to see the same people featured over and over again. Is it wrong to admit I’m curious about the title of the last one? Kitty scritches to your kids.
.-= heide´s last blog ..Cookied Out & A Finished Knit! =-.
Chris- Having a son that has done some interesting facial hair looks- I think they call that a “soul patch” but that’s not the usual version.
Who can keep up with these things?
.-= Lorraine´s last blog ..Who says…….? =-.
wait a second… i’ve heard that title before…
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/12_Inches_of_Snow
.-= furiousball´s last blog ..Happy Birthday to Us – the aftermath… =-.
Brrr!!!
.-= Miranda´s last blog ..REVIEW: Genesis =-.
Maybe Mr. 9 Inches has ED issues and he’s had to create one of the infamous Minnesota snow penises. Although if you are going to make one out of snow, why stop at only 9 inches? Go all out. I swear, that cover could keep us going in jokes forever. Shrinkage, etc. The topics are endless. Or I’m just really perverted. Or both. 😀
Oh yeah and now Jase’s title has me with an image in my head I really don’t want. Arrgghh. Perverted, yep.
9 Inches of Snow – I just….the possibilities are endless….
Mastering Chaos – that’s just awesome (for Chaos, that is).
Hate the soul patch.
Mighty Flynn – something there’s just not right.
Congratulations on your wins. Sheesh. I’m not jealous. Really.
You deserve them for finding all the fascinating stuff you put on your blog. Even if Chaos isn’t impressed.
Tam – you are perverted. That’s why we love you!
.-= wren´s last blog ..Handcuffed Hottie in a Hood – part quatre =-.
*sigh* Alas, the only way for Changeling authors to have real people on their covers is to turn to free or cheap stock photos.
I assume you’re well aware of the alternative. 😉
.-= K. Z. Snow´s last blog ..Come to my party (pretty please). =-.
KZ: I actually really like your cover! And yeah, it’s much better than the usual Changeling cover.
*tries to forget the other Changeling covers that come to mind*
I mostly got stuck at that last title…and I thought I came up with bad ones
.-= blodeuedd´s last blog ..ARC Review: Into Suez – Stevie Davies =-.
Ohgosh…. Yea.. WFHG is a disaster poor thing… Trying to master Chaos – silly man – tricks are for kids!
Hope you had a great weekend hon!!!
Hm nice man chesty 🙂
.-= katiebabs´s last blog ..WTFckery Or Not? You Decide =-.
Teddypig’s comment cracked me up!
(Just don’t go knocking the model’s soul patch. Apolo Ohno has one too, you know. That makes it tres cool.)
.-= K. Z. Snow´s last blog ..Come to my party (pretty please). =-.
Well, if he wants to master Chaos, I suggest he puts on some heavy clothes, perhaps the kind welders wear to protect them from sparks.
Chaos keeps emailing me that he is a badass, but he sure doesn’t look like one today.
.-= Brenda´s last blog ..Week in Photos =-.
I like “Caterpillar on Chin Guy”.
LOL. This was the funniest one yet. Mastering Chaos…don’t try it, WGHG!! (aka COCG). It would be easier to master the Chaos known to physics than the one living down my street.
These poor men you profile. They really do yearn for success, but never achieve it. SO sad.
.-= Carolyn Crane´s last blog ..Eric Northman interviews Little CJ at DIK…and major industry news! =-.
Aaaak – Jeanne took the exact words right out of my keyboard.
.-= Cheryl S.´s last blog ..Radar =-.
I can’ believe you’re making fun of Nine Inches of Snow & the Ebony Princess – can’t you see it’s a “Classic”
Ugh, not a fan of the facial hair of this guy, you’re right it is weird. And his hairdo is too!
What’s up with the Mighty Flyn cover, that looks kinda unnatural, I first thought the woman was pregnant…
It’s amazing how good you are in finding all these covers! And how often the same cover models are used, over and over again.
The kitty pic is adorable 🙂
.-= ErotRomReader Janna´s last blog ..Monday’s Hot Couple, but no Sexy Smutty Scene =-.
He looks cuddly and snuggly and cute – and that is his trick to lull you into a false sense of security so that he can get you to do his bidding without question – or it may be that is just what he wants you to think (that he has a plan) when he is actually just cuddly and snuggly and cute…
Nine inches of snow? No attempts at subtlety there, none whatsoever! I would like see a photo of one of those infamous snow penises of Minnesota that Tam mentioned …
.-= Val Kovalin´s last blog ..Time to reveal the lies =-.
Your wish is my command, Val…
I’m scarred for life, now. Scarred, I tell you. Between some of the things cover artists come up with and the names publishers (or whomever) pick… *shudder*
.-= Nicole´s last blog ..Monday Misc – Now With Snippets =-.
I like the cover for The Mighty Flynn – isn’t that a song or something from the Beatles? I would call him contorted chest guy – the photo seems off.
.-= Julia Rachel Barrett´s last blog ..Miscellaneous thoughts. =-.
It suddenly occurred to me that the authors of at least some of these books must use a pseudonym and NOT tell their mothers what they do for a living!
.-= janna´s last blog ..Harbingers of Spring (and a knitting-related question) =-.
Wow. I think that woman has special inflatable sacks in case of a water landing. @_@;
.-= Seanna Lea´s last blog ..quickie not quiche =-.
I don’t think anyone can master a cat. Cats don’t have masters—they have servants.
I laughed so hard when I read about ‘Mastering Chaos’. They really don’t know anything about cats 🙂
.-= mrspao´s last blog ..Beef in beer =-.
The quantity of reading you do consistently amazes me.
Mastering Chaos…as if. However, if he tried, perhaps Chaos could be persuaded to trim (shred, maul, destroy) that unfortunate caterpillar.
I’m still giggling over caterpillar on chin guy. It’s such an appropriate name.
Sometimes I wonder if the people designing these covers just grab a bunch of random images and stick them together. But then maybe it wouldn’t seem that way if I read the books.
Chaos obviously knows it’s silly to even think about mastering a cat.
.-= Sydney´s last blog ..A Blogiversary, And Suddenly It’s Spring =-.
“The Mighty Chaos”
.-= lisa´s last blog ..I guess this is good =-.
Chaos looks like he is having a wonderful sleep.
Caterpillar on the chin guy is also weird physique guy IMHO, however that is just me. lol
We enjoyed beautiful weather here today. Spring? I don’t think quite yet. lol
.-= Lea´s last blog .."Montana Legacy", by R.C. Ryan – Review =-.
I like facial hair but this one’s a bit weird.
I can’t get over that title. Nine inches of Snow? LOL
Chaos is such a cutie!!
I think protruding nipple guy would fit him just as well.
9″ of snow? Really?
.-= Tracy´s last blog ..What I Read Last Week =-.
*poke* *poke* Katie says hi to Chaos.
Cocg doesn’t inspire a lot of imagination with the cover ‘artists’ does he? No tattoos or anything. He just gets flipped to look left and right.
I love the The Might Flynn…. oddly shaped facial hair and all…
Good rest Chaos… I think I’ll join you..
E.H>
.-= Erotic Horizon´s last blog ..Review – Switching Gears & Stardust – Claire Thompson =-.
he also has this very strange line down the middle of his body – like a seam or something –
too much slouching? or did the camera man fold the photo in half?